Personal Journey

Mu’aadh a 29 year old, and a couple of his siblings are of marriageable age. “In Yemen marriage is like the biggest project in your life,” he explains. “The family and extended family helps, and some opt for marrying cousins and relatives because it’s a way to alleviate the financial pressure. But one of the main ways now which goes hand in hand with becoming an adult and proving oneself as a responsible breadwinner is to emigrate and establish yourself abroad.” He asserts, “If you are lucky some of your children will be girls because then they become part of the guy’s family and his responsibility. But if you have all boys then you better send some or all of them abroad.” Mu’aadh himself migrated to the U.S. , following the practice of emigrating alone and working abroad. “You emigrate and establish yourself so you and her [the bride’s] family know that you have access to a secure future, ” says Mu’aadh. The sacrifice made by these emigrants is honored and respected in Yemeni society.

“Sometimes I wonder how our lives became so much more complicated than our parents and their parents’ generation. Already our generation is becoming more individualistic and our demands greater. But overall we are very blessed. I have a community and friends here [in the U.S.] and our families live well back home. At least it’s not like other countries like Palestine or Lebanon where there’s danger of going back or we have to leave forever. Yemen is our home and where our families, our wives and daughters live."